Rachel - Just Another Angel...
Feb. 25th, 2012 01:00 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gwaevalarinWhen Castiel returns to Heaven, after averting the Apocalypse, dying for humanity, and being an outcast for so long, he is greeted by a small group of angels, right there, in his favourite Heaven.
I want to make clear what a big deal this is. There is Castiel, who ripped up the pages and laughed destiny in the face. Who opposed not only one but, all in all, three archangels on several occasions, who was hunted by his brothers as Heaven's public enemy number one. Yet here they are, a group of angels who might never have been to earth, who don't know anything about choice and free will, and they welcome their lost brother home, not as a rebel who has found his way again, but as a hero.
Yes, sure, they believe that it was God who brought him back, and that therefore, what Castiel did, must have been their father's will. But no one told them that's what happened. They came to this conclusion all by themselves. And so they decide to put their faith and trust in this common - yet anything but common - soldier and not the only remaining archangel, who is the highest ranking officer now, and, by the old order, has every right to make the calls.
And from this group of angels, who made their first real choice without even realising it, one steps forward to greet Castiel as more than just a hero, a symbol, a bringer of a new era. She greets him as a friend and dearly missed brother. An angel who is equally surprised and relieved to see her brother alive. Rachel.
Rachel does not understand the concept of free will at this point, but she shows something very important if she wants to learn about it: She shows curiousity. And she shows open-mindedness. When Castiel tells her that it wasn't God who stopped the Apocalypse but two mere humans (and an old drunk and a fallen angel) she accepts that. She accepts it as God's will, because that is the only explanation she knows and that will ever make any sense to her, but nevertheless, she accepts that destiny has changed.
And she looks at Castiel and sees someone who as chosen by God to do the right thing. His rebellion, his free will, everything that was seen as a mortal sin before, is something holy in her eyes. Not because someone told her, but because that is what she feels. It feels right to her, and she decided to listen to her heart, and not the words and commands of her superiors.
While I'm not too fond of angels other than Baltahzar calling Castiel "Cas", I almost like that Rachel chooses to address him by his nickname here. It is like she is taking her fist careful steps in this new world where Castiel is no longer the obedient soldier of Heaven, but Cas, the angel who feels and follows his heart, and that is where Rachel wants to go too.
But she doesn't understand it yet. She knows that this path that Castiel is on is good and right, but she does not know what this path is exactly, what it means. She asks Castiel to lead them. The same old principle, just with someone new giving the orders. But that is, of course, not how it works. When Castiel tells them that they are free now to choose their own fates, Rachel is confused. It is such a foreign concept to her that she simply can't grasp it. She wants to understand, but surely someone has to tell her what God wants, and if he wants them to have free will, then he has to let them know what he wants them to do with it.
So she looks at Castiel, who was supossed to be her new leader by making everything better while leaving everything the same, and she starts to understand that this is not what he is bringing them. And suddenly, just for one moment, she is unsure. Probably even slightly afraid for the very first time in her existence. But she still chooses to put her faith and trust in Castiel and what he tries to teach them. And she is so firm in this believe, and so eager to learn and understand and trust, that she soon becomes Castiel trusted lieutenant.
And not even two years later, this almost naive and obedient angel has gained the ability to have quite a strong opnion of her own. And she is not afraid to give the Winchesters a piece of her mind.
When it comes to the Winchesters, Rachel thinks a little like Balthazar: She doesn't particularly like them, but Castiel cares about them a lot, so fine, she won't smite them right there and then. But the moment those annyong humans start to demand that their problems are more important than anything else because apparently they are the centre of universe or something, she will remind them that there is a freaking civil war going on in Heaven, and that Castiel just happenes to be the leader of the rebellion.
And then she says something that says a lot about how much has changed in Heaven, about how much Rachel has changed, and about how much she has learned:
"I'm his [Castiel's] friend."
She calls herself Castiel's friend, not his sister. Of course she is his sister too, of course they are a family, like all angels are. But Rachel feels more than that for Castiel. She feels friendship. And she understands that being friends means that you are there for each other, even if that means dealing with your friend's annoying humans so he can deal with more important problems. She also understands that calling someone just when you need them is not how a friendship is supposed to work, and that's the point when she goes back from friend to the big sister who is protective of her brother. And she gets angry, because she sees the burden on Castiel's shoulders and how the Winchesters only make it worse. And as important as the war is, her little outbreak here is not about that. It is mostly worry about Castiel, maybe because she has already heard the first rumours, and she is afraid to see her friend tumble under all this.
It is remarkable that an angel who, not so long ago, had no idea how to do anything but follow orders, has turned into such an outspoken, strong-minded creature, who has a better grasp on what is wrong between the Winchester boys and Castiel than they do.
I want to take a short moment and talk about a detail that tells a lot about how she has changed as well: Her vessel's clothes. Rachel went from almost a uniform when Castiel returned to Heaven, to her own style here.
Castiel sounds almost strangely soft when he stop her, and she instantly grows quiet. I don't think this is because he is her superior, even though I'm sure she does usually follow his orders, but because she doesn't want to make things worse for him by arguing with his two humans in front of him.
Rachel's voice is a lot softer too than it was just seconds ago, when she starts arguing with Castiel because he shouldn't have to deal with this, and she can take that weight off his shoulder for a bit, and he shouldn't stay because it is slowly killing him, and she cares, because he is her brother and friend, and she doesn't just want to stand by and watch his attachment to these humans destroy him. Not just their hope to win the war, but him.
I always say that Team Save Castiel had only one member. But I honestly think that it had two.
Rachel hesitates before she leaves. She still isn't quite at the point where she dares to ignore a direct order, but she doesn not want to leave, and she thinks that it is a bad idea, and she makes sure that Castiel knows as much. When she does leaves she is angry, at the Winchesters, at Castiel, and at herself. But most of all, she is worried.
The next time Rachel and Castiel meet, she has learned about his deal with Crowley. I wonder where she got it from, how the rumours made it to Heaven, but it seems they were convincing or I'm sure Rachel would not have listened to them. But still she doesn't pass judgement right away. She summons Castiel to talk to him first, to ask him if the rumours are true. She wants to hear it from himself, and when he more or less confirms it by giving his reasons, she is disappointed and sad more than anything.
It's interesting, by the way, that Castiel doesn't lie to her. He knows she won't like it but he still sees a chance that she will see the necessity. But she doesn't.
And here is the most tragic part: When Rachel decides that for her this isn't acceptable, that she can't follow Castiel any longer, and that he has to die for what he did to save their cause, it is probably the first time that she really executes the free will he taught her. She makes her decision to turn against her leader and - albeit chosen - superior. You can see how it hurts her to do this. To the very last moment when she draws her sword, she is torn between what she believes in and her love for Castiel. She does not hate him, she does not want to kill him, but he brought her free will, and with it the resposibility to decide for herself what is wrong and what is right, and she has to act on that.
And I believe that, even though Rachel and Castiel ended up in a fight to the death because they believed in different paths, they were friends and loved each other to the very last moment of Rachel's existence. Rachel tried to kill the leader who would otherwise lead them down a road she believed was wrong, she never wanted to kill her friend and brother, and that is why I could never hate her for what she did.
Goodbye, Rachel. You came a long way, and I wish it could have ended differently.
I want to make clear what a big deal this is. There is Castiel, who ripped up the pages and laughed destiny in the face. Who opposed not only one but, all in all, three archangels on several occasions, who was hunted by his brothers as Heaven's public enemy number one. Yet here they are, a group of angels who might never have been to earth, who don't know anything about choice and free will, and they welcome their lost brother home, not as a rebel who has found his way again, but as a hero.
Yes, sure, they believe that it was God who brought him back, and that therefore, what Castiel did, must have been their father's will. But no one told them that's what happened. They came to this conclusion all by themselves. And so they decide to put their faith and trust in this common - yet anything but common - soldier and not the only remaining archangel, who is the highest ranking officer now, and, by the old order, has every right to make the calls.
And from this group of angels, who made their first real choice without even realising it, one steps forward to greet Castiel as more than just a hero, a symbol, a bringer of a new era. She greets him as a friend and dearly missed brother. An angel who is equally surprised and relieved to see her brother alive. Rachel.
Rachel does not understand the concept of free will at this point, but she shows something very important if she wants to learn about it: She shows curiousity. And she shows open-mindedness. When Castiel tells her that it wasn't God who stopped the Apocalypse but two mere humans (and an old drunk and a fallen angel) she accepts that. She accepts it as God's will, because that is the only explanation she knows and that will ever make any sense to her, but nevertheless, she accepts that destiny has changed.
And she looks at Castiel and sees someone who as chosen by God to do the right thing. His rebellion, his free will, everything that was seen as a mortal sin before, is something holy in her eyes. Not because someone told her, but because that is what she feels. It feels right to her, and she decided to listen to her heart, and not the words and commands of her superiors.
While I'm not too fond of angels other than Baltahzar calling Castiel "Cas", I almost like that Rachel chooses to address him by his nickname here. It is like she is taking her fist careful steps in this new world where Castiel is no longer the obedient soldier of Heaven, but Cas, the angel who feels and follows his heart, and that is where Rachel wants to go too.
But she doesn't understand it yet. She knows that this path that Castiel is on is good and right, but she does not know what this path is exactly, what it means. She asks Castiel to lead them. The same old principle, just with someone new giving the orders. But that is, of course, not how it works. When Castiel tells them that they are free now to choose their own fates, Rachel is confused. It is such a foreign concept to her that she simply can't grasp it. She wants to understand, but surely someone has to tell her what God wants, and if he wants them to have free will, then he has to let them know what he wants them to do with it.
So she looks at Castiel, who was supossed to be her new leader by making everything better while leaving everything the same, and she starts to understand that this is not what he is bringing them. And suddenly, just for one moment, she is unsure. Probably even slightly afraid for the very first time in her existence. But she still chooses to put her faith and trust in Castiel and what he tries to teach them. And she is so firm in this believe, and so eager to learn and understand and trust, that she soon becomes Castiel trusted lieutenant.
And not even two years later, this almost naive and obedient angel has gained the ability to have quite a strong opnion of her own. And she is not afraid to give the Winchesters a piece of her mind.
When it comes to the Winchesters, Rachel thinks a little like Balthazar: She doesn't particularly like them, but Castiel cares about them a lot, so fine, she won't smite them right there and then. But the moment those annyong humans start to demand that their problems are more important than anything else because apparently they are the centre of universe or something, she will remind them that there is a freaking civil war going on in Heaven, and that Castiel just happenes to be the leader of the rebellion.
And then she says something that says a lot about how much has changed in Heaven, about how much Rachel has changed, and about how much she has learned:
"I'm his [Castiel's] friend."
She calls herself Castiel's friend, not his sister. Of course she is his sister too, of course they are a family, like all angels are. But Rachel feels more than that for Castiel. She feels friendship. And she understands that being friends means that you are there for each other, even if that means dealing with your friend's annoying humans so he can deal with more important problems. She also understands that calling someone just when you need them is not how a friendship is supposed to work, and that's the point when she goes back from friend to the big sister who is protective of her brother. And she gets angry, because she sees the burden on Castiel's shoulders and how the Winchesters only make it worse. And as important as the war is, her little outbreak here is not about that. It is mostly worry about Castiel, maybe because she has already heard the first rumours, and she is afraid to see her friend tumble under all this.
It is remarkable that an angel who, not so long ago, had no idea how to do anything but follow orders, has turned into such an outspoken, strong-minded creature, who has a better grasp on what is wrong between the Winchester boys and Castiel than they do.
I want to take a short moment and talk about a detail that tells a lot about how she has changed as well: Her vessel's clothes. Rachel went from almost a uniform when Castiel returned to Heaven, to her own style here.
Castiel sounds almost strangely soft when he stop her, and she instantly grows quiet. I don't think this is because he is her superior, even though I'm sure she does usually follow his orders, but because she doesn't want to make things worse for him by arguing with his two humans in front of him.
Rachel's voice is a lot softer too than it was just seconds ago, when she starts arguing with Castiel because he shouldn't have to deal with this, and she can take that weight off his shoulder for a bit, and he shouldn't stay because it is slowly killing him, and she cares, because he is her brother and friend, and she doesn't just want to stand by and watch his attachment to these humans destroy him. Not just their hope to win the war, but him.
I always say that Team Save Castiel had only one member. But I honestly think that it had two.
Rachel hesitates before she leaves. She still isn't quite at the point where she dares to ignore a direct order, but she doesn not want to leave, and she thinks that it is a bad idea, and she makes sure that Castiel knows as much. When she does leaves she is angry, at the Winchesters, at Castiel, and at herself. But most of all, she is worried.
The next time Rachel and Castiel meet, she has learned about his deal with Crowley. I wonder where she got it from, how the rumours made it to Heaven, but it seems they were convincing or I'm sure Rachel would not have listened to them. But still she doesn't pass judgement right away. She summons Castiel to talk to him first, to ask him if the rumours are true. She wants to hear it from himself, and when he more or less confirms it by giving his reasons, she is disappointed and sad more than anything.
It's interesting, by the way, that Castiel doesn't lie to her. He knows she won't like it but he still sees a chance that she will see the necessity. But she doesn't.
And here is the most tragic part: When Rachel decides that for her this isn't acceptable, that she can't follow Castiel any longer, and that he has to die for what he did to save their cause, it is probably the first time that she really executes the free will he taught her. She makes her decision to turn against her leader and - albeit chosen - superior. You can see how it hurts her to do this. To the very last moment when she draws her sword, she is torn between what she believes in and her love for Castiel. She does not hate him, she does not want to kill him, but he brought her free will, and with it the resposibility to decide for herself what is wrong and what is right, and she has to act on that.
And I believe that, even though Rachel and Castiel ended up in a fight to the death because they believed in different paths, they were friends and loved each other to the very last moment of Rachel's existence. Rachel tried to kill the leader who would otherwise lead them down a road she believed was wrong, she never wanted to kill her friend and brother, and that is why I could never hate her for what she did.
Goodbye, Rachel. You came a long way, and I wish it could have ended differently.
