gwaevalarin: (Cas)
a.k.a. this is possibly wishful thinking but I don't care a.k.a there is always hope.

After the latest interviews mit Sera (one, two)? Not gonna lie, I had a bit of a panic attack. Until I fortunately decided to read them again more closely.

spoilery but mostly speculations (there is also some mention of a current Fringe storyline) )
gwaevalarin: (Cas)
After what happened in 7x01, I'm trying to come up with an new acceptable scenario for 7x02 regarding Castiel's fate, because my initial one is now pretty much out of reach.

spoiler for spn 7x01, assumptions based on when Misha has or hasn't been (seen) on set, and mentions of a small spoilery comment from Misha's last interview )

Can anyone see a believable alternate scenario that I'm not seeing right now? Anything? Please?
gwaevalarin: (Cas)
Okay, I have read quite a few other views and opinions, positive and negative by now, so I think it's time for a (hopefully) a little more coherent recap. Nope, sorry, coherency is apparently not going to happen with this episode.

SPOILER for Supernatural 7x01 )
gwaevalarin: (Cas)
First of all: Can we get Misha an award already? Emmy? Oscar? Every award ever?
I knew he was good, but this... I mean... I'm completely lost for words. I officially declare Misha Collins the best actor to ever have graced my screen. Just wow!

Second of all: I expected a lot of things when going into this episode. I did not expect this.
I did not end up a sobbing mess, even though there were quite a few gasps and tears, not gonna lie. I did not end up raging and screaming and throwing things at my screen.
Quite the contrary. This episode was pretty much perfect. If the storyline as a whole works, will have to be seen next week. But for now, Show and I are good again.
I feel infinitely better about things now. And at the same time infinitely worse and more worried. But in the right way. I think.

incoherent rambling and spoilers under the cut )
gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
Title: Lost Northern Star
Fandom: Supernatural
Characters/Pairing: Castiel/Balthazar, Dean
Rating: PG
Spoiler: 6x22
Warning: unbeta’d
Disclaimer: I wish they were mine so I could keep them safe, but they are not.
Word count: ca. 1500
Summary: Balthazar refuses to give up on Castiel.

A/N: I just love the thought of Balthazar being the one to get through to Castiel, and writing about the different ways it could happen it is very therapeutic.
Title stolen from Tarja Turunen.

Dean can feel blood running down the side of his face. )
gwaevalarin: (Cas)
It's Misha's birthday today, so there won't be any negativity in this blog. And you know what, that works better with the new trailer than I thought it would. Want to know why?

cut for spoilery promo )
gwaevalarin: (Cas/Dean)
I think some people may be getting a wrong impression regarding my feelings towards Supernatural at the moment. I think some people may be getting a wrong impression regarding the entire Castiel (and Cas/Dean) part of the fandom, but I can only speak for myself, and I want to make a few things clear here:

Most importantly: I love this show.
I may be ranting and worrying and complaining a lot lately. I wouldn't do that if I didn't care.

Equally important: I still love Sam and Dean. Maybe not as much as I love Cas and Balthazar and Gabriel and (hate-love) Crowley, but of course I love them. I don't think it's possible to watch this show if you don't.
I also firmly believe that this show, in its core, has always been, will always be, and should always be about these two brothers. They are the heart and soul of Supernatural, and I don't think anyone could possibly doubt that.
BUT it can't be only about them. lengthy post about my feelings about this show, the characters, and what it is that I'm complaining about )

And here is another very important reason why - despite everything - I won't leave anytime soon: I love this fandom and I love the cast (and, most of the time, the crew)

This fandom, with all its wank and fighting, still is a big family. An most of the people I know support each other, and respect each other's opinion. There are quite a few black sheep, and that can hurt, but at the end of the day, most of you - and certainly everyone on my flist - are the most insane-in-a-good-way, creative, passionate, kind, unique bunch of people I've ever met. And even if the show should go downhill completely, I wouldn't leave because I don't want to leave YOU.

And this crazy, big family includes a lot of the actors, and quite a few of the writers, directors and other people working on the show. I don't think there is any other fandom where the actors are that involved and care that much. Be it Twitter, or cons, or insiders they send our way in interviews. They are just as completely insane as we are, and they never fail to brighten up my day.

I feel like I have found my home. Maybe we will move on one day, maybe we will go our separate ways at some point, maybe we will meet again in a different fandom. But for now, you are my family and this show is my home.
And this is exactly why I still love this show with all my heart. And this is equally why I worry and complain so much when I feel that things go terribly wrong. Because I care.
See a theme here?

ETA: Spoilers in the comments. You've been warned
gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
or take a photo of what I can see before my mind's eye or something. Since last night I've had this post-season 6-finale picture clearly in my mind, and it's so beautiful and heartbreaking, but unfortunately I have no way of getting it out other than trying to describe it:

Imagine a room made entirely of white marble. At least you have to assume it's a room, you can see neither walls nor the ceiling. It just sort of fades away into nothingness. Nothingness that is almost impossible to look at. It is not blinding, like light, but simply... well, nothing.
There are a few steps, maybe four or five, leading to a throne (made of white marble, just like everything else).
On this thrones sits Castiel, exactly how we know him, suit, and crooked tie and trench coat and all. You can see that he is powerful and in control, and at first glance just as cold and beautiful as the stone all around him. But when you look a little closer, look at his eyes, they are still as blue and deep as the ocean, just like they always were. They are still so very Cas. And you can see the loneliness and the pain in them while he stares into the distance.
Right at his feet, a little to his left, sits Balthazar on the top-most step. He is dressed entirely in black, a stark contrast to all the white around them. And he looks up to Castiel with nothing but love and worry. Balthazar looks like he wants to reach out and touch his brother, but he knows that he can't reach him. So he stays there and hopes and prays that somewhere deep down Castiel knows that Balthazar will never leave him. "You always have little old me."

I cannot get this picture out of my head.
gwaevalarin: (Castiel)
To my angel )

I wrote this for letterstocas on tumblr, but I also wanted to have it here.
gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
Title: To Be Loved
Fandom Supernatural
Characters/Pairings: Castiel/Balthazar
Rating: PG
Spoiler: up to 6x22
Warning: unbeta’d
Disclaimer: Not mine. If they were, there would be hugs.
Word count: ~1000
Summary: "I could never turn on you. I would never leave you." Fix-it coda for 6x22
A/N: I’m not much of a writer, but this needed fixing, so I found a way to fix it.

Castiel feels the power surge through him... )
gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
Okay, I'm somewhat calm now. Still devastated, and angry, and so not okay with this, but calm. And I have decided that I am going to have this whole mess make sense somehow, if it kills me - and it just might, as I'll have to rewatch (parts of) the episodes for this.

So this is going to be less of a review, and more of a first attempt on my personal head canon, where I just might end up ignoring and re-interpreting scenes left and right if I have to. I'm also stealing from ideas I read on LJ and tumblr. So I can't take credit for everything, I'm just putting stuff together, and hope that it'll somehow hold.

spoiler for Supernatural 6x21 and 6x22, and a lot of things that don't make sense. Yet. )
gwaevalarin: (Balthazar)
From an interview with Sebastian:

slightly spoilery )

You can find the interview in its entirety here. It is worth reading, and just so very Sebastian. ♥

There is also another interview with him, again only very vaguely spoilery, that includes this:

Roché, who is quickly becoming a staple at fan conventions, pointed out that now is the time in the television landscape to really interact with the fans and bring them into the dialogue of the show. It is just so easy to, especially with things like Twitter right at everyone's fingertips.
"The response is overwhelming, and for what it's worth I haven't really heard one negative thing. Well, maybe that's just because those who don't like me aren't Tweeting me, but still."
He encourages the interaction because it's a way to connect with the fans and let them know that they (as members of the cast, or even crew) appreciate the support.

D'awwwwww! ♥
gwaevalarin: (Castiel)
Dear Ben Edlund:
I hate you. Marry me?

Okay, attempting to write that review now. I have a feeling I may end up quoting pretty much the entire episode.

Supernatural 6x20 )

Two weeks? Really? I'm so glad I'll have the con to distract me.
gwaevalarin: (Castiel)
Break my heart, will you? )
gwaevalarin: (Castiel)
Sera Gamble had a little something to say about our angel and his role this season. I cut the spoilery parts, so it should be safe for everyone to read:

Soldiers and compromises )

December 2013

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