gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
Title: Lost Northern Star
Fandom: Supernatural
Characters/Pairing: Castiel/Balthazar, Dean
Rating: PG
Spoiler: 6x22
Warning: unbeta’d
Disclaimer: I wish they were mine so I could keep them safe, but they are not.
Word count: ca. 1500
Summary: Balthazar refuses to give up on Castiel.

A/N: I just love the thought of Balthazar being the one to get through to Castiel, and writing about the different ways it could happen it is very therapeutic.
Title stolen from Tarja Turunen.


Dean can feel blood running down the side of his face. )
gwaevalarin: (Cas/Dean)
I think some people may be getting a wrong impression regarding my feelings towards Supernatural at the moment. I think some people may be getting a wrong impression regarding the entire Castiel (and Cas/Dean) part of the fandom, but I can only speak for myself, and I want to make a few things clear here:

Most importantly: I love this show.
I may be ranting and worrying and complaining a lot lately. I wouldn't do that if I didn't care.

Equally important: I still love Sam and Dean. Maybe not as much as I love Cas and Balthazar and Gabriel and (hate-love) Crowley, but of course I love them. I don't think it's possible to watch this show if you don't.
I also firmly believe that this show, in its core, has always been, will always be, and should always be about these two brothers. They are the heart and soul of Supernatural, and I don't think anyone could possibly doubt that.
BUT it can't be only about them. lengthy post about my feelings about this show, the characters, and what it is that I'm complaining about )

And here is another very important reason why - despite everything - I won't leave anytime soon: I love this fandom and I love the cast (and, most of the time, the crew)

This fandom, with all its wank and fighting, still is a big family. An most of the people I know support each other, and respect each other's opinion. There are quite a few black sheep, and that can hurt, but at the end of the day, most of you - and certainly everyone on my flist - are the most insane-in-a-good-way, creative, passionate, kind, unique bunch of people I've ever met. And even if the show should go downhill completely, I wouldn't leave because I don't want to leave YOU.

And this crazy, big family includes a lot of the actors, and quite a few of the writers, directors and other people working on the show. I don't think there is any other fandom where the actors are that involved and care that much. Be it Twitter, or cons, or insiders they send our way in interviews. They are just as completely insane as we are, and they never fail to brighten up my day.

I feel like I have found my home. Maybe we will move on one day, maybe we will go our separate ways at some point, maybe we will meet again in a different fandom. But for now, you are my family and this show is my home.
And this is exactly why I still love this show with all my heart. And this is equally why I worry and complain so much when I feel that things go terribly wrong. Because I care.
See a theme here?

ETA: Spoilers in the comments. You've been warned
gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
or take a photo of what I can see before my mind's eye or something. Since last night I've had this post-season 6-finale picture clearly in my mind, and it's so beautiful and heartbreaking, but unfortunately I have no way of getting it out other than trying to describe it:

Imagine a room made entirely of white marble. At least you have to assume it's a room, you can see neither walls nor the ceiling. It just sort of fades away into nothingness. Nothingness that is almost impossible to look at. It is not blinding, like light, but simply... well, nothing.
There are a few steps, maybe four or five, leading to a throne (made of white marble, just like everything else).
On this thrones sits Castiel, exactly how we know him, suit, and crooked tie and trench coat and all. You can see that he is powerful and in control, and at first glance just as cold and beautiful as the stone all around him. But when you look a little closer, look at his eyes, they are still as blue and deep as the ocean, just like they always were. They are still so very Cas. And you can see the loneliness and the pain in them while he stares into the distance.
Right at his feet, a little to his left, sits Balthazar on the top-most step. He is dressed entirely in black, a stark contrast to all the white around them. And he looks up to Castiel with nothing but love and worry. Balthazar looks like he wants to reach out and touch his brother, but he knows that he can't reach him. So he stays there and hopes and prays that somewhere deep down Castiel knows that Balthazar will never leave him. "You always have little old me."

I cannot get this picture out of my head.
gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
Title: To Be Loved
Fandom Supernatural
Characters/Pairings: Castiel/Balthazar
Rating: PG
Spoiler: up to 6x22
Warning: unbeta’d
Disclaimer: Not mine. If they were, there would be hugs.
Word count: ~1000
Summary: "I could never turn on you. I would never leave you." Fix-it coda for 6x22
A/N: I’m not much of a writer, but this needed fixing, so I found a way to fix it.

Castiel feels the power surge through him... )
gwaevalarin: (Balthazar)

Balthazar Fanwork Exchange
on [livejournal.com profile] spn_balthazar


Sign-up is now open, so go and help yourself and all of us through the evil hiatus.
gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
Okay, I'm somewhat calm now. Still devastated, and angry, and so not okay with this, but calm. And I have decided that I am going to have this whole mess make sense somehow, if it kills me - and it just might, as I'll have to rewatch (parts of) the episodes for this.

So this is going to be less of a review, and more of a first attempt on my personal head canon, where I just might end up ignoring and re-interpreting scenes left and right if I have to. I'm also stealing from ideas I read on LJ and tumblr. So I can't take credit for everything, I'm just putting stuff together, and hope that it'll somehow hold.

spoiler for Supernatural 6x21 and 6x22, and a lot of things that don't make sense. Yet. )
gwaevalarin: (Balthazar)
From an interview with Sebastian:

slightly spoilery )

You can find the interview in its entirety here. It is worth reading, and just so very Sebastian. ♥

There is also another interview with him, again only very vaguely spoilery, that includes this:

Roché, who is quickly becoming a staple at fan conventions, pointed out that now is the time in the television landscape to really interact with the fans and bring them into the dialogue of the show. It is just so easy to, especially with things like Twitter right at everyone's fingertips.
"The response is overwhelming, and for what it's worth I haven't really heard one negative thing. Well, maybe that's just because those who don't like me aren't Tweeting me, but still."
He encourages the interaction because it's a way to connect with the fans and let them know that they (as members of the cast, or even crew) appreciate the support.


D'awwwwww! ♥
gwaevalarin: (Cas Bal)
Hey everyone,

I'm in desperate need of someone to create a banner for the Balthazar Fanwork Exchange that I'm planning to host on [livejournal.com profile] spn_balthazar shortly after the season finale.
I offer you creative freedom - as long as the banner has Balthazar, preferably no other character, and the words "Balthazar Fanwork Exchange" - my eternal gratitude, credit of course, and possibly a small donation to your Hope To Haiti Crowdrise page.
The banner should be finished by the day the finale airs.

Anyone interested? Or do you maybe know someone who may be willing to help me out?
gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
I'll be honest: I was extremely spoiled for the episode, and I didn't expect too much from it. Aside from some fun thanks to a certain character maybe. Boy, was I wrong. See, season 6, this is how amazing you can be.

Supernatural 6x17 )
gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
The Wind and the Sea
Fandom: Supernatural
Pairing: Balthazar/Castiel
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Not mine, just playing with them
Spoiler/warning: If you know who Castiel and Balthazar are, you're good; unbeta'd
A/N: Written for [livejournal.com profile] takadainmate for the Balthazar Comment Fic Meme
Prompt: Trueform!Castiel and Trueform!Balthazar, in any way, shape or form. Fighting, gossiping, in the past, in the future, or now.

In his true form, Castiel was like the sea. )
gwaevalarin: (Balthazar)

Over at [livejournal.com profile] spn_balthazar
gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
Before I actually watched the episode, I was planning on an epic post about spoiler for Supernatural 6x15 )
gwaevalarin: (Profound Bond)
First of all: Thank you, [livejournal.com profile] raths_kitten for your Valentine vgift. My mystery gift turned out to be a squirrel. How very perfectly Random Act-y. :)

While I was spending the last few days on my sofa, because I was/am sick, there where three things that brightened up my days immensely: Tweets from a certain actor of French and Scottish heritage, episode stills from a certain episode, and my ever wonderful Rhino Team 4.

Last night, Sebastian Roché had this little, still unofficial, bit of news for us:



When I read it for the first time last night, I completely missed that it said UK convention, which means that it can only be Asylum 7. Guys, it looks like I'm going to meet Sebastian in October! Now, if they announce Misha as well, that weekend is going to be the very definition of my own personal heaven.

There are also some pictures floating around the net that most of you have probably seen by now, but which I just can't leave uncommented:

As spoilery as episode stills combined with the overall episode theme happen to be )

Bottom line: I need to see this episode, like right now! This is going to be the most insane and epic hour of television we will ever witness. Who cares if we will all lose whatever is left of our sanity in the process.

As for the Rhino Hunt: I promise you'll get an update this weekend on how amazing Team 4 continues to be. It will possibly even include a video of our biggest master piece and proof of team spirit. *g*

Odyssey 5

Dec. 26th, 2010 11:42 pm
gwaevalarin: (Balthazar)
To be honest, I didn't expect much from this show when I asked for the DVDs for Christmas. I only wanted it because it has Sebastian Roché in a leading role and I figured that even if it turned out to be a rather trashy scifi show it would probably still be entertaining.

Five episodes into the show, it turns out that, despite the rather ridiculous initial set-up and the not too great special effects, the show is actually pretty good. It has episodic storylines, that always add something to the big arc, it has interesting characters that struggle with this weird situation they're thrown into, the weight on their shoulders and their relationships with each other. It's a group of very different characters, thrown together by the cause of events. They have their differences, but they learn to trust each other and become a team.

some very general spoilers but no major plot points )
gwaevalarin: (Bal/Cas)
In my opinion, Balthazar is pretty much the best thing coming out of Supernatural's season 6 so far. He doesn't get nearly as much screen time as I would wish but I still feel we already know quite a bit about him. So I put together a bit of a character analysis of our rogue angel.

spoiler up to Supernatural 6x11 )

And just because it made me laugh:

sebroche: @mishacollins Hi Cass, happy holidays from Bathazar aka Baltie !!!

Is it just me, or does he sound like a fanboy?
Is Baltie the official nickname then? I've got used to Bal by now. I guess, I'll never agree with the official nicknames for my favourite angels, will I?
gwaevalarin: (Profound Bond)
I have no idea where that just came from but cut for spoiler up to Supernatural 6x03 in case anyone hasn't seen it yet )

By the way, for those of you who don't know: I'm not the type to look for a ship in every show I watch. But once in a while I feel that two characters just have an amazing chemistry and then I don't care if they're male, female, human, alien or angel. Normally, however, that doesn't happen after they had just something like 5 minutes of screen time together.
gwaevalarin: (Profound Bond)
I'm back from Asylum 5 where Misha told us that Castiel is gay, lost his virginity to Balthazar and is apparantly Dean's wife. Furthermore, Misha overshares. And I hope he buys a new mattress.

Also: character spoiler )

Explanations, detailed reports of panels, meet&greet and coffee lounges as well as photos and even a video will follow soon. After I get some sleep.

For mow let me just tell you that this con was just amazing!
gwaevalarin: (Default)
I liked this character before I even knew him and he has exceeded my expectations so...

[livejournal.com profile] spn_balthazar


Feel free to join, spread the word and if you have any creative ideas as in header, layout, icons etc. you are very welcome to help me.
This is, after all, my very first community so I'm not entirely sure I know what I'm doing. But I am sure that I'll figure it out.

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